Sunday, February 3, 2013

Struggling

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have sat down at the computer to write a blog post and stared at a blank screen for hours.  I have been struggling to keep up contribute anything at all to this blog, which makes me sad because I truly enjoy writing here.  There are excuses, poor excuses and I know it, but I'm going to share them with you anyway.

Time.  I spent a lot more time in 2012 saying "yes" and all those activities I said yes to took up more of my time.  We were busy in 2012 and it felt like we had something going on every weekend.  I actually had to use my calendar to keep track of things.  In the past I just had a calendar because it gave the appearance that I'm an organized person.  Last year I had to actually be an organized person.  I was busy...but I still found time to sit on the couch and watch 8 hours of Downton Abbey in one day.  My priorities are not in order.

Trouble finding the "sweetness".  I have been sad, frustrated, lonely.... I have had a hard time finding the sweet spot in every day.  I'm going to share more about this on Wednesday, so come back then to read about how I'm changing my view.

I just went through and deleted a bunch of blog posts that were never published because I didn't think they were good enough.  It's time to stop being so critical of myself.  This is my blog and if I want to write about the Super Bowl party I'm heading out to in a few minutes then I should be able to write about it.

There are blogs I read every day, even if it means I have to get up early to get them all read before going to work.  My favorite blogs don't write about the same things every day....it's just about their life.  They may have a theme they try to keep up with, but there are plenty of days when they go off topic and just write about whatever is on their mind.  I want one of those blogs.  I want to write about whatever comes to mind without the (self induced) pressure to make sure it's "sweet" and meets a certain word count.

There may be days where I simply post a picture and 1-2 sentences.

There will be days when I tell you about the cute thing one of my nieces/nephews did.

There will be days I will write long posts about nothing, or about everything.

Thankful Thursday will come back.

 I will fail and I will come back.  I love looking back on my previous posts and I want to have more to look back on.  I will keep writing, even if I'm the only one reading.


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